Thursday, January 26, 2006

******* Job Application *******
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This is an actual Job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a Mc Donald's fast-food establishment in Florida...And they hired him because he was honest and funny!

Name: Greg Bulmash

Sex: not yet. still waiting for the right person.

Desired Position: company's president or vice president. But seriously, whatever is available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

Desired Salary: $185,000 a year plust stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severence package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

Education: yes, but ask me when I cross 25.

Last Position: target for middle management hostility.

Salary: less than what I'm worth.

Most Notable Achievement: my incredible collection of stolen pens.

Reason for leaving last Job: It sucked.

Hours available: any hours as long as they don't stop my schedule.

Preferred Hours: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

Do You Have Special Skill: yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

May We Contact Your Current Employer?: If I had one, would I be here?

Do You Have Any Physical Conditions That Would
Prohibit You from Lifting Up To 50 lbs: of what?

Do You have A Car: I think the more appropriate question here would be "do you have a car that runs?"

Have You Received Any Special Awards Or Recognition: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes.

Do You Smoke?: on the Job no, on my breaks yes.

What Would You Like To Be Doing In Fiver Years Time: living in the Bahamas.

Do You Certify That The Above Is True And Complete
And To the Best Of Your Knowledge: yes. absolutely.

Sign Here: aries. but will change for extra pay.

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